Hockey Terms

Blueline—Mark on ribcage from leaning over bar, replaying game.
Redline—Mark on new sweater from leaning over Wet Paint sign at penalty bench.
Net—The 25% which goes to winner of 50-50 draw.
Zamboni—Machine used to fill arena with noxious, poison fumes.
Deke- "The Enforcer"-leads league in PIMs.
PIMs—Rating system for unskilled players.
Offside—Hitting on the team owner’s daughter.
Pass—See Offside.
Score- See Offside-Also see "Traded."
Rink—Weekend hangout for parents.
Bodycheck—Test rink boards, glass, for durability.
Slapshot—Movie poking fun at Canada’s national past-time.
Hooking—What the gal in the thigh-length boots up in Section 14 does for a living.
Shoot—What religious kids say after missing wide-open net.
#@$%&#—What religious kids say after missing net in Week 2 of season.
Scoreboard—Place for annoying company signs and logos.
President Cup—Trophy awarded to championship team just prior to opening of training camp.
Europeans—Skilled players who refuse to watch Coach’s Corner.
Gross Misconduct—The sometimes carryings on of very rich role models.
Play by Play—Break between TV commercials.
Predators—Agents.
Penalty Box—Good place for TV close-ups of players mouthing the "F" word at each other.; word at each other.