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Dog Haiku

Categories: General
Added: Sun Aug 25 06:00:00 -0600 2002Views: 6,651
Rating: - (0 votes)
Doggie PositionDogs Letters To God >
Submitted by funny-pictures
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I love my master;

Thus I perfume myself with

This long-rotten squirrel.

I lie belly-up

In the sunshine, happier than

You ever will be.

Today I sniffed

Many dog butts—I celebrate

By kissing your face.

I sound the alarm!

Paperboy—come to kill us all—

Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I sound the alarm!

Garbage man—come to kill us all—

Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

I lift my leg and

Whiz on each bush . Hello, Spot-

Sniff this and weep.

How do I love thee?

The ways are numberless as

My hairs on the rug.

My human is home!

I am so ecstatic I have

Made a puddle.

I Hate my choke chain.

Look, world, they strangle me! Ack

Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack!

Sleeping here, my chin

On your foot—no greater bliss—well,

Maybe catching rats.

Look in my eyes and

Deny it. No human could

Love you as much I do.

The cat is not all

Bad—she fills the litter box

With Tootsie Rolls.

Dig under fence—why?

Because it’s there. Because it’s

There. Because it’s there.

I am your best friend,

Now, always, and especially

When you are eating.

You may call them fleas,

But they are far more—I call

Them a vocation.

My owners’ mood is

Romantic—I lie near their feet.

I fart a big one.

My owners’ mood is

Romantic—I lie near their feet.

I fart a big one.

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Latest Comments
Face Like A Tackle Box
Oct 27, 19:57
Real nice dude.
I Will Not Love You Long Time
Feb 24, 20:17
Okay, I guess a short time will do...
Pig Poke
Dec 28, 22:06
Squeal like a pig!
Boob Buckles
Nov 30, 03:24
Make Lots of Friends Before You Move!
Nov 30, 00:53
Those Budget vans are funny...